I'm feeling really, really down. I don't know whether is just because of October, which I always find bit depressing (probably because I'm getting old again end of the month) or are all these medication playing up with my hormones.
Periods seemed the longest ones I've ever had. Still going on. I've checked my blood results (advantage of working in the same place where bloods are taken) and everything seems normal so far. In a way big relief but then again just makes me wonder, what the heck is going on?
I'm not preparing myself at all to be pregnant again (if I ever do get pregnant again). I'm preparing myself to go through a third miscarriage. I'm already thinking whether I should have a D&C again or just have it come out naturally. It just horrible that I will never be able a pregnancy. I will never be happily pregnant, just waiting it to end before it's time.
I'm starting to feel that becoming a mum is not for me. Despite of how much I want it, it's not going to happen. And seeing all the white trash, living on my tax money, disgusting thick folk having unwanted & one-night stand accidents, just makes my blood boil! It's so so bloody unfair world that it makes me sick.
I'm wondering, whether positive thinking will have any effect of becoming pregnant and carrying a baby full term?
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2 comments:
Oh, I'm so sorry for this. Makes me really sad. I also had great problems in getting pregnant after I had to interrupt my first pregnancy due to medical problems. It was an extremely difficult time for me, both physically and mentally.
I wish you truckloads of luck and yes, I believe that positive thinking has a great effect. :-)
Thank you for your kind comment. All the good luck is needed.
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